Not Doing Anything

I find myself not doing anything quite often.  I'm not talking about being lazy though.  I mean, not doing something when I should.  Many times, I find myself having something very important to say to a group, while we're discussing something - like in Sunday School, or just when I'm out with friends.  We're talking about something important, and I give no input at all.  Or if I do, when my statement is challenged, or even just asked about - for more information - I shrink back.  Like I'm suddenly afraid to make anymore ripples in the lives around me.

We touched on this thought in many of my theology classes back in college.  Omission is when we know if our hearts that we should do or say something, but we stay quiet.  I hate it when I'm passive this way.  I could be influencing others for God's Kingdom, but something holds me back.  Maybe the fear of not being liked or accepted by those I'm around.  No one I knows likes to be disliked. But every time this happens, I get so mad at myself because I know I should have voiced my thoughts to more than just my husband.

I find I'm just as guilty as the man Jesus talked about in Luke 16.  This is the story about a rich man and a poor man named Lazarus.  This rich man saw Lazarus everyday of his adult life, yet he never spoke to him or offered him any of his wealth.  How many times do we see people in need, and just walk past them?  Maybe we think to ourselves "I should do something for him." but if we never do anything, what good was our thought? Did it make us feel better about passing him by?

I need the strength and the courage that only God can give me.  I need to come to the realization that when God wants me to say something, it's more important than what a dozen people may end up thinking about me afterward.  At what point am I choosing not to further God's Kingdom because I'm selfishly afraid to loose friends or family?

I pray that I become the strong woman of God that God knows I can be.  Otherwise, he wouldn't even ask me to say or do these things.